Although I always complain about how stupidly smashed they become – somehow the two men always make a damn good meal, which may very well be the only thing that gets me through the night.

Super Bowl XLIV food menu:
50 Juniors whiskey barrel wings (with their delicious homemade blue cheese dressing)
Guacamole and chips (made by moi)
Goldband, Bluepoint, and Wellfleet Oysters (provided by Jack’s Oyster House)
Grilled Lamb chops with roasted potatoes and steamed asparagus

I guess there wasn’t much “cooking” that they had to do, but the lamb was the last thing to make – and it was surprisingly a perfect medium rare.

My second favorite part of the night was when I left the boys in the living room and watched the Puppy Bowl on Animal Planet – they were the cutest mutts in the world, and I hope someone adopts them because of that show….Go to PetFinder dot come. (P.S. Michael Vick, I have one word for you – you are such a loser. Oh and I think the fact that they let you play football again is revolting.)

And finally my third favorite part of the evening was when one of the football dudes grabbed the ball and psyched his opponents out and ran down the end zone (I think that’s what it’s called) and scored a touch down – then he did a little dance. Yup that was the only moment I was watching the game – it was cool.

Anyway, back to P.F. Chang’s – I ordered the VIP Duck. We told the waitress it was our first experience at the restaurant, and she suggested several house favorites – none of which we ordered.

VIP DUCK – A tender half duck served Cantonese-style and glazed with a sweet soy plum sauce. Served with (chive) flatbread, scallions and cucumbers (served with white or brown rice)

It was by far the best meal I have ever eaten at a chain restaurant – so simple and easy. There were few ingredients, yet so much flavor. Although I have never visited an Asian country I can only imagine this is a meal that you would find at a local restuarant (at least that’s what Anthony Bourdain seems to be eating). Except, I if you were eating this meal in China I doubt Celine Dion or Kelly Clarkson would be playing on the surround sound system.

Sam and I decided to recreate the VIP Duck. We found a whole frozen duck at the grocery store, but that is still sittng in our freezer because we had already defrosted a pork roast. Sam marinated cucumbers in mirin wine, which is sweetened sake, and he sprinkled a few black and white sesame on top. Our pork was coated with hoisin sauce and olive oil. We found naan, which is a South Asian flat bread that Sam brushed with olive oil and lightly toasted. All paired with a roasted garlic and olive oil couscous. Move over P.F. Chang’s.

I can only find two words to sum up the savory pork, sweet cucumber, crispy bread – mmm good. Next time we’re going to try the duck, although the fatty pork was an excellent substitute paired with the cooling cucumber.

A Critton, is a wonderful fun-loving person; who is full of life, enjoys culture, crafts and adventure; and they do everything backwards. For example, a Critton may retire half a decade early, buy a condo in a foreign (non-English speaking) country that they have only visited once. A Critton might sign a legal deed with their significant other without ever even contemplating marriage because they don’t need a piece of paper to say they are committed. Sam (a Critton) is secretly planning on knocking me up before he puts a rock on my finger (He jokes – but I think he is serious). There are a ton of other unorthodox things I could tell you about Critton’s, but it would be inappropriate to divulge this information on the internet.

The bride and groom on their wedding day - Providence, RI

On Friday, September 25, 2009 the youngest of four Critton’s was married first in a very beautiful, yet unconventional ceremony. Only immediate family members and significant others were invited to this very exclusive ceremony – about fourteen people watched the couple exchange their vows in a panoramic room over looking downtown Providence, Rhode Island. Jenna, the bride, was a bit skeptical of changing her name to “Critton,” but I checked her Facebook status and her name reads, “Jenna Critton” – I think that means it’s official.

A Critton

The party reception was held at one of the couple’s favorite restaurants in Providence, which was adorned with blushing white roses (specially ordered by the groom). We ate tasty hors d’oeuvres like lobster bisque shots; cocunut shrimp with a spicy-sweet Thai sauce served in coconut shells; and we drank from our bottomless wine glasses.

The party continued back at the hotel until the wee hours of the morning. After the newlyweds went to consummate the bed went to sleep; and after several cases of beer and wine the Critton crew went down to the young couples get-a-way car and decided to tie beer bottles to the tail pipe and write “Just Married” in tooth paste (courtesy of the front desk) across the rear windshield.

The wedding clan minus the bride's bff, who was the photographer

The Critton’s didn’t have enough fun the night of the ceremony, so two weeks later they gathered again for another party and more fun, which they called “the reception.” The party reception also lasted late into the evening.

FYI – it only takes a few Crittons to have a good time.

Remember that apple pie I said I was going to make? Well, we made one this afternoon, but the apples aren’t from the secret apple tree that is around the corner. We made a pie and two quarts of applesauce from the four pounds of apples that we handpicked last weekend. Did you know apple pie is easy to make? Although next time I vote to ditch the pie and dip the raw apples in the sauce that goes into the pie — warm butter, white sugar, brown sugar, flour, water, and cinamon. Did I mention the homemade whipped cream? Ok, I guess we can keep the pie (and make extra sauce for dipping purposes).

Sam and I enjoyed the roasted marrow bones we ate at New World Bar and Bistro so much that we decided to make some more. We smeared our homemade applesauce on rye toast and sprinkled the delicious spread with sea salt.

Then we made cream spinach and boiled two 2 ½ pound lobsters (we ate them before I could snap a picture). If I had to chose a last meal — this would be it. Yum. Now Sam is making some lobster bisque from the lobster shells.

Exucse me while I go unbutton the top button of my jeans — they’re a bit snug.

For dinner we enjoyed a delicious raw salmon salad with fresh lettuce from our garden, and a homemade salad dressing that I prepared.

Sweet & sour dressing:
ginger
olive oil
lemon juice
sugar
honey
fresh parsley
sesame seeds
salt and pepper
dijon mustard

Directions: Eyeball ingredients. Put in food processor and serve.

For our main course we dinned on Balzer’s lobster and some ginger sesame rice. Later we took the left-over lobster shells and prepared a lobster bisque. We looked up some recipes online, but we ended up throwing a bunch of good stuff in the pot and going with the flow. Onions, parsley, dill, bay leaves, butter, cream, salt & pepper, lobster shells, and fresh nutmeg from Carriacou

I’d let you know how it turned out, but it almost 12:30 am, and the lobster is still cooking. Our apartment smells like a creamy delicious lobster bisque!

Last night, I got lucky because we had fillet mignon, which I’ve read is a healthier red meat choice. Of course, Sam made steak diane, which is smothered in cream, peppercorns, mushrooms and brandy. Cream being the key word. So bad for you, yet so tasty and perhaps worth it. All food is healthy if it’s in moderation, right?

Sam even lit it on fire like they do in fancy restaurants:

Luckily, I made a very tasty salad to balance out the unhealthiness, and we drank a nice hearty glass of red wine. Salad ingredients: Spinach, mixed greens, blue cheese crumbles, strawberries, onions, pine nuts [walnuts are better], croutons, and a
balsamic vinaigrette dressing

Broccoli salad:
3 heads of raw broccoli
1 lb. lean bacon
1/2 onion
1 cup of low-fat shredded cheddar cheese [I used mozzarella above]
3 tablespoons of apple cider vinegar [this is key]
1 1/2 cups mayo with canola oil
2/3 cups sugar

Directions: Fry bacon, drain and crumble. Combine bacon, broccoli and onion in large bowl. In a separate bowl, mix vinegar, mayo and sugar. Drizzle over broccoli. Top with cheese. Enjoy.

Dessert: Grenada’s organic dark chocolate

I should have been a nutritionist.

I did some more research and found an organic nursery called George’s Market in Latham. They took some of the dirty work out of gardening by growing the seeds for us. So, what’s new on the menu?

chives
eggplant
parsely
green peppers
Arugala and lots of other green lettuces
fennell [Sam thought he was buying dill]

We also bought thyme and pineapple sage for our potted herbs on the front stoop. Hopefully, we can make back the $70 we spent on our planted veggies by not having to buy any of them at the grocery store!

Before

After we planted