Do you know what a Critton is? No? Well, I’m going to tell you.
A Critton, is a wonderful fun-loving person; who is full of life, enjoys culture, crafts and adventure; and they do everything backwards. For example, a Critton may retire half a decade early, buy a condo in a foreign (non-English speaking) country that they have only visited once. A Critton might sign a legal deed with their significant other without ever even contemplating marriage because they don’t need a piece of paper to say they are committed. Sam (a Critton) is secretly planning on knocking me up before he puts a rock on my finger (He jokes – but I think he is serious). There are a ton of other unorthodox things I could tell you about Critton’s, but it would be inappropriate to divulge this information on the internet.
The bride and groom on their wedding day - Providence, RI
On Friday, September 25, 2009 the youngest of four Critton’s was married first in a very beautiful, yet unconventional ceremony. Only immediate family members and significant others were invited to this very exclusive ceremony – about fourteen people watched the couple exchange their vows in a panoramic room over looking downtown Providence, Rhode Island. Jenna, the bride, was a bit skeptical of changing her name to “Critton,” but I checked her Facebook status and her name reads, “Jenna Critton” – I think that means it’s official.
A Critton
The party reception was held at one of the couple’s favorite restaurants in Providence, which was adorned with blushing white roses (specially ordered by the groom). We ate tasty hors d’oeuvres like lobster bisque shots; cocunut shrimp with a spicy-sweet Thai sauce served in coconut shells; and we drank from our bottomless wine glasses.
The party continued back at the hotel until the wee hours of the morning. After the newlyweds went to consummate the bed went to sleep; and after several cases of beer and wine the Critton crew went down to the young couples get-a-way car and decided to tie beer bottles to the tail pipe and write “Just Married” in tooth paste (courtesy of the front desk) across the rear windshield.
The wedding clan minus the bride's bff, who was the photographer
The Critton’s didn’t have enough fun the night of the ceremony, so two weeks later they gathered again for another party and more fun, which they called “the reception.” The party reception also lasted late into the evening.
FYI – it only takes a few Crittons to have a good time.
After a 90 minute massage and an hour of getting our feet pampered, we were feeling greasy from the rubbing oil and extremely sleepy from a relaxing afternoon, but we were also very hungry — so we confiscated our pedicure flip-flops and headed to one of my favorite restaurants, 
Last weekend Sam and I went to his little brother’s wedding (
Remember that 
One would think that turning apples into vodka and brandy would be a big production, but everything is prepared in a small warehouse processed by a machine that looks like it came from Willy Wonka’s factory. They’re a small batch distillery with only 100 gallons brewing at a time, and I also learned that it takes 75 lbs. of apples to go into one bottle. More fun facts 
Remember this 
Personally, I’m not a fan of American cars at least not the ones driving out of today’s factories (no offense, but I just wouldn’t be caught dead driving one). However, my dad’s old truck has been well kept – restored to its original glory – no added extras to make it faster or louder or perform well. The truck is straight off the factory from 1966 with only 83K original miles — it purrs like a kitten, maybe a big kitten, but nonetheless it’s marvelous. The truck came with it’s original owner’s manual and a black and white picture from it’s hay day.
